Doug Ford makes up with Mark Carney… Grifter’s Pizza Bromance: When Principles Crumble Like a Thin Crust

Doug Ford’s Pizza Diplomacy: When Principles Crumble Like a Thin Crust

The Great Reconciliation: From Trade War to Pepperoni Peace

By Eddie Hardie 🍁 Integrity Canada

In a stunning display of political theater, Ontario Premier Doug Ford and Prime Minister Mark Carney recently demonstrated that no policy disagreement is too significant to be papered over with melted cheese and carbohydrates. Just days after Ford vocally criticized Ottawa’s deal to bring thousands of Chinese EVs into Canadian markets, the two leaders held a “very productive meeting” over pizza in Toronto, emerging with the profound revelation that “at the end of the day, make no mistake about it. We are one country.”

One might wonder what brand of magical pizza possesses such conflict-resolution properties. Is there a special “national unity” topping blend unavailable to ordinary Canadians? Or perhaps the mozzarella was specially aged in parliamentary privilege?

A Pattern of Policy Whiplash

Ford’s rapid pivot from critic to collaborator fits neatly into an established pattern of reversals that have come to define his premiership. Consider his track record:

• Greenbelt grab-and-return: Ford’s government first removed protected lands for development, then reversed course after the auditor general and integrity commissioner found the process unfairly favored certain developers, with the RCMP now investigating. A perfect illustration of the “act first, apologize later” approach.

• Education flip-flops: Legislation that imposed contracts on education workers using the notwithstanding clause was passed then repealed after workers walked off the job anyway.

• Public health funding: Retroactive cuts to public health funding in 2019 were announced, then largely reversed after mayors banded together to fight them.

• License plate fiasco: New blue license plates were introduced, then scrapped after police noted they were barely visible at night, though 170,000 remain on the road.

This pattern raises an important question: does Ford genuinely hold policy positions, or does he simply trial-balloon whatever serves immediate political interests before retreating when resistance emerges?

The Scandal Buffet: An All-You-Can-Eat Affair

While Ford positions himself as a pragmatic leader willing to “work across the aisle,” his administration has been mired in controversies that suggest something less noble than political flexibility:

• Courtroom regular: Ford’s government has lost more than a dozen court cases, with judges repeatedly ruling against provincial legislation.

• Secrecy spending: Crown lawyers spent 1,672 hours over three years keeping Ford’s leaked mandate letters secret during a five-year legal fight.

• Environmental overrides: Environmental groups have called for investigations into Ford’s decision to override an independent regulator to help Enbridge lock in gas customers.

• Public boos: Thousands of people booed Ford at the Toronto Raptors’ NBA Championship Parade—a rare honor for a sitting premier.

Pizza Over Principle: The New Canadian Governance Model

The recent pizza summit establishes what might be called the “Parmesan Principle” of Canadian politics: any substantive disagreement can be resolved through the strategic application of Italian cuisine. One imagines future political crises being averted not through compromise or thoughtful policy, but through the judicious deployment of calzones (for minor disagreements) or a full lasagna (for constitutional crises).

This approach to governance reduces complex policy debates about international trade, economic sovereignty, and environmental impact to the level of a condiment choice. Should we accept Chinese EVs that might undermine domestic manufacturing? Let’s discuss it over extra pepperoni. Are we compromising our standards for foreign investment? More mushrooms might help us see the issue differently.

The Real Cost of Political Convenience

What’s troubling about this political theater isn’t that politicians occasionally break bread (or pizza crust). It’s the pattern of governance it represents: policymaking as performance, substance sacrificed for symbolism, and principle that evaporates at the first whiff of mozzarella.

Consider the context: Ford criticized a trade deal that affects Canadian auto workers, manufacturing, and economic sovereignty. These are not trivial matters. Yet days later, he’s sharing a pie and proclaiming national unity. This isn’t statesmanship; it’s political convenience masquerading as cooperation.

The pattern extends beyond this single pizza summit. Ford’s government has repeatedly demonstrated a “ready, fire, aim” approach to governance—from the Greenbelt scandal to education policy to public health funding—where policies are announced with great fanfare, then reversed when they prove unpopular or legally problematic.

An Alternative Theory: The Closet Liberal Hypothesis

Given Ford’s willingness to criticize conservative positions (like opposing Chinese EV imports) before cozying up to a Liberal prime minister, some have advanced the “closet liberal” theory. The evidence? His policy reversals often align him with positions traditionally associated with the political left:

1. Apologizing for Greenbelt removal after public outcry

2. Repealing wage-cap legislation after court challenges

3. Canceling cuts to legal aid and public health funding

4. Now softening on Chinese EV imports after meeting with Carney

Could it be that Ford’s “conservatism” is merely a costume, donned for electoral purposes but discarded when inconvenient? Or is he simply an opportunist whose principles are as flexible as a well-worked pizza dough?

The Ontarian’s Dilemma: Trust or Boot?

As Ontarians look toward future elections, they face a fundamental question: is this brand of flexible governance an asset or a liability? Ford’s defenders might call it pragmatism—a willingness to adapt when circumstances change. His critics see something more troubling: a pattern of governance characterized by poor initial decisions followed by reluctant reversals, with taxpayers often footing the bill for these about-faces.

The pizza summit with Carney perfectly encapsulates this governing style. Rather than thoughtful engagement with complex trade issues, we get photo ops and platitudes about national unity. Rather than consistent principles, we get whatever position serves immediate political interests.

In Ford’s Ontario, you don’t need to be right—you just need to be willing to apologize (sometimes) and share a meal with your critics. It’s governance as public relations, substance sacrificed for symbolism, and policy made as flimsy as the cardboard box that delivered the peace-making pizza.

Perhaps the most fitting epitaph for this style of leadership comes not from political commentary, but from Ford’s own license plate fiasco: barely visible when it matters, but stubbornly remaining on the road long after its flaws have been exposed.